So now we’re doing limericks

Just saving some really amusing limericks and other poetry from the Bloodties Lifetime blog. I’ll add more poetry as it appears.
Please note that I’m only responsible for writing one of these. I’m just saving the rest for posterity. Comments in parentheses and italics are mine.

There once was a P.I. named Vicki.
Took on cases extremely icky.
Met Henry Fitzroy
And oh what joy
Things proceeded to get really sticky.
Posted by: Annalaise duChat

Despite limited visual ability,
Vicki checked on the clinic of fertility
But Henry’s assistance
Was moot in this instance
For his swimmers were lacking motility
Posted by: ms.gyspy | (That would be me. That second line is awkward, innit?)

There once was a lady named Gypsy
Who made beer and got a bit tipsy
Drinking games we did play
On the floor we did stay
Now I drink to get tipsy w/Gypsy**
Posted by: DIZEY1 (I’m blushing!)

Will Vickie choose Henry or Mike?
One of them must take a hike
Vamp and then human
She keeps going through them
Which one does she actually like?
By Kurapika404 (posted by Laurel)

There once was a cop named Mike
Whom Henry tried not to bite
Along came a monk
Mike lost a chunk
And Vicki’s staying out of sight!
Posted by: DIZEY1

I’ll first taste your blood my dear,
To do that I must bite here
I said “what the heck!”
And showed him my neck.
Cuddling after? Yes dear!
Posted by: Laurel

There once was a man called Fitzroy
Who was *VAMPED* when only a boy
He wandered through history
To many a mystery
Hell I wish I could just be his TOY
Posted by: DIZEY1
There once was a vampire named Henry
Who counted his lovers as many
Then he met Vicky
And things got sticky
Since there were not any
Could make him forget Vicky
Posted by: Claire (It’s not very limerick-y but I like it nonetheless)

Really enjoyed the things you’ve been rhyming
I thought I would try, but I’ve got really bad timing
This blog is the best,
of that I attest
The walls it does keep me from climbing.
Posted by: Tango

I know of Henry of Richmond
Who’s condo had no kitchen
The zombie he salted
The priestess he halted
And now Vicki’s no longer bitchin’
Posted by: DIZEY1 (I think DIZEY1 is the reigning Duchess of Rhyme, working up to Queen.)

We watched as Vicki, Henry did sniff
We watched as his body did go stiff
We watched him fight the perp
and from her arm did slurp
Oh Lord do we think our Blood Ties terif
I think it works… *shrugs* We’ll try again later. 🙂
Posted by: Anzia
There was a vamp named Fitzroy,
Man he looked good, this our boy,
For vicky we long a kiss, oh my,
Soon to be, we scream with joy!!!!
Posted by: susana (Not a limerick per se but rather good nonetheless…)

There once was a man named Henry,
Who sent all our hearts into a frenzy,
But Lifetime said NO,
you won’t see the show,
Until there’s snow.
Posted by: Margaret (Again, a poem, not a limerick. I hope Lifetime doesn’t really say NO, though!)

There once was an addict named Tango
Who liked her youtube vids in slowmo
At Kyle she did gaze,
her heart was ablaze
Keep those videos coming ~ I say, “Bravo”!
Posted by: Tango |

We thought that Norman was dead
Sucked into a vortex they said
He duped Henry & Vicki
The kissing got really icky
And Astaroth’s coming for her head
Posted by: DIZEY1

Said Henry to Vicki “I bite!
But I’ll try not to give you a fright.
Try not to struggle,
after we’ll snuggle,
if passion you’ll let me ignite.”

Said Vicki “I think that I might.”
But she opted to put up a fight.
Avoiding his kiss
she’s likely to miss
a preternatural delight!
Whooo I did it! I managed to use “preternatural delight” in a limerick. It wasn’t easy.
Posted by: Annalaise duChat (and congratulations on using preternatural delight. That can’t have been easy!)

Henry had a little take-out
Vicki had a little freak out
Demon Tats a burning
Astaroth is yearning
Watch while they knock Norman’s light out
Posted by: Maddie Mo

Henry, he wanted some passion,
Which Vicki, she wanted to ration;
They both leaned in tight,
But Vicki veered right,
So Henry must just keep on askin’.
Posted by: ndayeni
There once was a vampire named Henry,
Who lived life with gusto and energy;
He met an ex-cop,
Who had issues–a lot–
Now to love her is the fate of poor Henry.
Posted by: Ndayeni


There once was a BloodTies fan Sandy
Who loved all the BloodTies eye candy
With fang in her throat
This limerick she wrote
With the help from her BloodTies blog fam’ly.
*bows to blog-kin* – it’s all your fault!
Posted by: Sandy

TO ALL MY BLOOD TIES BUDS
THE SILENCE HIT W/A THUD
WE SCRAMBLED AND WROTE
TO EACH OTHER A NOTE
NOW I’M READY FOR ABUCKET O’ SUDS
POSTED BY: DIZEY1
Danielle |

The Lifetime blog is saying goodbye
But the Blood Ties fans never say die
To Gypsy’s we did move
We had something to prove
Waiting five months and still asking why

Norman from Hell got his ticket out
Most people still thought he was a lout
The three items he found
While slinking around
But in the end he went back to pout

Several people we have tried to turn
But some of them can’t seem to learn
They won’t listen to us
So then we want to cuss
It appears that they don’t give a durn

Hey I am pretty damn proud of them (As they say, I don’t know much about art but I know what I like and I like these! Thanks, Danielle!)
DIZEY1 Says
There once was a girl named Beth
Who lived her life obsessed
She impatiently waited
For Henry she stated
Now this summer will be her test

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2 Comments »

  1. dizey1 said

    TO ALL MY BLOOD TIES BUDS
    THE SILENCE HIT W/A THUD
    WE SCRAMBLED AND WROTE
    TO EACH OTHER A NOTE
    NOW I’M READY FOR ABUCKET O’ SUDS
    POSTED BY: DIZEY1

  2. RosieP said

    We Finally Got To See Vicki & Henry Kiss.
    Short Of Death, It’s A Moment I Wouldn’t Have Missed.
    If Only To Have Seen More While They Were Together On The Floor.
    Life Time, October? Why Do You Torture Us Like This?!

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